Chapter 8: Friends

Hahh…hahh…!

Please…! Even if it’s just for a moment…just…listen to me.

I… Ever since that day, I’ve been thinking about you.

About what would happen if you disappeared…

Like, what if I said something else, or if I acted differently, would you still be here?

“What should I have done back then?” kept replaying in my mind.

… … …

Even now… I still don’t know if it’s right for me to do this…

But… Whether this is right or wrong, I knew you’d hate it if I kept thinking about it… That’s the only thing I was sure of…

…Then–

But, but still…!

I want to be friends with you! No matter what, I want you to know that!!

Ah… …

…Because that’s the only thing I’m sure of!

After messing up just once, I’ve been thinking about it over and over again!

And I know that doing that is what you hate most, Mizuki, but…but…!

I’m only doing that because I want to be friends with you forever, Mizuki!

I’m sure of that, at least…!

… …I’ve…had enough of this.

Why don’t we just part ways…?

Because then you’re going to have to worry about even more things from here on out, right?

Like, is it okay for you to talk about this? You might feel even more unsure about yourself….

I don’t…think it’d be good for us to stay together.

… …

That’s wrong…

That’s not what I’m trying to tell you!

Don’t you do the same thing, Mizuki?!

… …

If you really feel that way then why… Why don’t you just run away like you did last time?!

…!

I don’t…want to be apart from you, Mizuki.

If something I do hurts you, then I’ll try to not do it again…

Even if you hate being thought of that way…

but it’s because I don’t want to hurt you! I’ve always thought this, and that’ll never, ever change! I’m going to feel that way forever!

Because you’re important to me, Mizuki!

Wh…why…?

Why are you saying that…?

If you stay friends with me, then you’re going to worry over every little thing you do and say, right…?

And what if people look at us strangely when we’re together…? What if people who don’t even know you start gossiping about you…?!

If that happens you’ll… You’ll still treat me so kindly…!

A-and every time I’ll see your face…even if I don’t want to…!!

If we weren’t friends, then I wouldn’t have to see you make that face, and you wouldn’t have to–

Stop worrying so much about me!!

I don’t care about whatever people would say or think about me–

That’s nothing compared to you disappearing!!

…!

But…! But…!!

I am concerned about you!

Your kindness–everyone’s kindness–I just can’t accept it…

Because I’m sure this’ll just happen again and again and again…!

I’m… I’m sick of being hurt like this…!!

Even if you show me such kindness, I’m sure so many things will hurt me…! And I’ll be stuck thinking, “If only it wasn’t like this…”

And that…will just make me wonder…“Is it really okay for me to call them my friends…?”

… …

A friendship filled with that much hurt… …

It’d be better off if we just parted ways, wouldn’t it?!

What the hell are you saying…?

What does “Is it really okay for me to call them friends?” even mean?

Because…

Saying if it’s okay to call someone your friend or not–it doesn’t work like that!!

Because you’re my friend aren’t you, Mizuki?! Or do you not feel the same way about me?!

If that isn’t how you feel, then… Don’t just decide for yourself if we’re friends or not!

…gh…

Why won’t you get it already?!

Ever since that day until know, I’ve been thinking about you a lot! I learned about some things I didn’t know before, but…

…My feelings haven’t changed one bit!

You’re the one that’s changed!

You aren’t listening to anything I say and you’re just running off on your own…!!

Thinking, “Can we really be friends” like some kind of idiot. Don’t you get it? To me, you’ll always be Mizuki–

You’ll always be my precious friend!

…!

I want you to at least understand that!!

That my feelings about you haven’t changed at all…

I was shocked, but…I still feel the same as I did before…

… … …That’s all I wanted to tell you.

So if you want to leave… I won’t stop you.

I’m sure that would make you happier, Mizuki…

E-Ena… …

I… …

Aren't they a weirdo?

I… …

[If you want to run away, then run.]

[But, this might be your last chance to face her honestly.]

What… …should I do…?

…Is it really…okay…?

For me to…still stay…with you…?

I’m sure…that I’m going to get scared again…and I’ll try to run away…again…

I’ll be so scared…and I won’t be able to believe you… I can’t help it when that happens…!

But… …

But, still… …!

But I still…want… to stay with you, too…!

I still want to stay friends…!!

I’ve always felt that way…

I don’t want to feel guilty when we’re together… That’s the kind of friend I’ve always wanted…

I want that…! But…it’s impossible…!

…I just know… I’m going to mess up again…

…But, still, I just… …

…Are you really okay with being friends with…someone like me…?!

I told you that it’s not about whether I’m okay with it or not, didn’t I?

I want you to decide that for yourself, Mizuki.

I’m just sorry for having to chase you around like this.

… …

…Ah… Wahh… …

…M-me too…!

…I-I’m sorry for being such a hassle…!

I’m sorry…for causing you pain…!

I want…to be with you…!!

I want to feel okay when I think of being with you together forever…!!

Then…

Let’s stay together, Mizuki.

Everyone in Niigo is waiting for you.

…!

Wahh…!

Welcome back, Mizuki.

…Yeah… Sorry for worrying you.

It’s alright, don’t worry about it.

It’s only because you’re all here for me… Thank you, so much… And… … … Uhm… … I have something to tell everyone… Something that I should’ve told you a long time ago…